VA Mortgage Questions?

How do you know where you are? My father passed away 2 years ago and was a military veteran, he served in Vietnam and the Korean War. I know he would be disqualified if he was still alive, but I (a girl) or my mother. We both receive VA benefits. I am curious if I should try to ask if I or my mother for me to be qualified.
I am a first time home buyer and VA loan guarantees. What is the best way to get a mortgage without getting screwed? We buy 18-24 months, primarily because we want to pay off credit card debt. I want 250-280k home, but do not want to get on my head. Some websites and programs would also be helpful. Thank you.

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