Should we try to get a loan or should he try to refinance?

long story made short what is an arms length law when getting a mortgage? My husband and my debt to income ratio is not good, okay we are trying to buy his dad and moms house or my father in law may refinance and put our name on a house because we are trying to pay his mom off in a divorce and this is the best thing we can come up with she wants 100,000.00 and her car, can he refinance his home by himself if both their names are on the house? how can this work we want to do whatever is quickest and easiest to make everyone happy and we want his parents house, and his dad is still goign to live in the house with us bc he is not in good health he cannot live alone, so how can we do this

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