finances making me crazy?

ok, i’m been saving as much as possible. i’m also trying to pay off my credit card debt. unfortionitly, i’ve had a lot of car problems that has run up my bill. i cant afford a new car, so i just have to deal it the repairs. i only work part time because i’m trying to finish up school. but i’m still working 30 hours a week and taking 8 credit hours as well. on top of it all, i’m getting married may of 09. my fiance and i really need to find a place. we’re both living with our moms for now to save money. renting in this area is not worth it. efficancy/ 1bed start at 1300. we’ve been looking at foreclosures because its the only thing we can really afford.
but every time i bring it up my mom just gets pissy saying we need to pay for the wedding before we worry about a place to live. i say we need a place to live before we worry about getting married. i know the wedding is going to cost about $ 8K….
she has over $ 5K of my money that she’s been taking out over the course of 3 years from my checking account. its her version of rent. yet she refuses to give it to us, she says its our wedding present. we need it for a down payment, or at least to go towards the wedding itself! she has no idea what things cost anymore. she thought the entire wedding would cost less than $ 10K, yet she keeps adding guests and limos and all sorts of stuff. shes paying the first $ 10K, everything else is up to us, yet she’s added over 30 guests from her own personal list, and since she’s giving us money i cant complain (tho i’ve had to cut out many from my fathers side of the family because of it). she thinks that a townhouse is $ 200K, or we can get a SFH for about the same. i work in a realestate office so i know whats around. she wont listen tho.
i’m going crazy and getting stressed with it all. i’m saving as much as i can, but i dont see anything happening.
since the begining of the year i’ve saved $ 500. but thats half of a months salary for me. thankfully my fiance is starting a new job next week which will pay $ 15K more a year, but i dont know if we’re going to be able to save for a house AND a wedding. i dont know what to do. i need to pay for invitations, the cake, the dress… everything but the venue and food (cause its included). thats all her money has covered. i dont know how many corners i can cut without screwing up my wedding. but i dont want to get married if i have no where to live!! and living with her is not an option for much longer. she’s making me crazy.

to make things worse, she just retired a few weeks ago, so now she’s home all day every day to drive me nuts.

i really love my job, my boss is amazing. its not her fault i cant get a raise because the market is so bad the entire company isnt allowed raises. she works with my schedule whenever i need, i can even do school work there, so i really want to stay
eloping isnt an option, both my fiance and i are only children. our parents would disown us, and we’ve already put a depost down on the venue. and i’ve shown her soooo many things on the market, our house has just about tripled in value since we bought it, yet she doesnt get it.

but i am willing to take ANY suggestions, so keep them coming.

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